Every once in a while, when I am having one of those days where I am deeply lost in the trenches and depths of my own mind, I come across a thought that will, sometimes literally, stop me in my tracks. A trend that, as of lately, has become something of the norm.
I can’t say that, even six months ago, I would be standing where I am today. I sound like I have made some huge accomplishment, and while I really haven’t, I also have. I have come to realize that really, you’re pretty much out here on this spaceship of a planet to make your own future, your own memory, and your own mark on the world. I also learned that along the way, you’re going to lose a lot of people who you thought would be by your side, only to have them replaced by the people you would least expect to see getting ready for battle.
A year ago I didn’t think I would still be without a big kid job, though I really use that term lightly. A year ago I would never have guessed that I would be where I am now with my photography, my band, or in a brand new comedy group. I also didn’t know that I would be 600 applications up the creek without a paddle. No one ever really tells you that when you are handing them those Benjamin’s. I can say, however, that I regret nothing. Even if everyone sees my goals and ambitions as “strange” or “odd.” They only say this because they didn’t think of them first. I am pretty sure when those two guys pushed a plane off of a hill the first time people gave them a weird look too.
People always say that “success has to be earned,” and I actually don’t feel that is true. If you want TRUE success, the kind that makes YOU happy…you make it yourself. It doesn’t actually exist, and it’s not something that can be awarded to anyone. It’s sitting all around you in pieces parts that you have to assemble yourself. Mine came in the form of a camera, a drumset, and an odd sense of wit that some people glare at, but it worked for me, and I saw it from a mile away.
A lot of people don’t agree with me, or think I am crazy for going off the beaten path. I just think they are jealous because they didn’t think to look in the brush on the side of the road first before I did. If anything, at least they remember my name.